Have your cake and eat it too. This vintage novelty print fabric brings sweets to the sweet. Dotted with bonbons, sugared fruit, and some bizarre confection shaped like a rooster, this print looks like a pastry shop’s window display. Who knew that olive green, yellow, orange, pink, red and chocolate brown could look so good together? I especially like the drawers with the little white knobs and the open shelves providing straight lines among the curves of the desserts.

There are 9 yards of this delicious stuff at 15 bucks a yard. If I could sew, I’d turn this into a trapeze-styled mini-dress and wear it to Café Roma to chow down on cannoli and tiramisu. I don’t know that I would be able to avoid the temptation of carrying a handbag shaped like an ice cream cone, a cake box, if such novelty handbags exist. But there is such a thing as too much whimsy, I fear.

Two months ago a fashion spread in my favorite Japanese magazine So-En, showed dangerous amounts of novelty. With the caption: No Animal No Fashion (just like that in English) a slim belted shirt dress printed with horns and hunting dogs was paired with riding boots and a leather purse in the shape of a dead duck draped across the shoulders. And there were many other examples of complete ensembles geared to a theme. (I regret not buying this issue, but I have trouble plunking down 30 bucks for a magazine.) Perhaps there is no such thing as too much whimsy. Or maybe I should just move to Japan, and get a job at So-En. But how, I ask you, how?

Salon has an article on Calorie Restriction, called “Diet your way to a long, miserable life!”. Ms. Rebecca Traister describes these folks who live on 1,200 -1,400 calories a day in the interest of longevity. Most people in the eating world (as opposed to the non-eating world) definitely eat too much, no surprise there. A few less calories won’t hurt. But a life-style devoted to weighing food on a postal scale would make it hard to live in our current world. That is, if you work a job, and don’t have the time and energy to devote to planning every meal in advance. On the other hand, the North American diet is total crap. And no one really knows what the ideal diet is for humans, though people are very devoted to their ways of eating (to the point of arguments and name calling). The mainstream media pumps out ridiculous articles touting studies of dubious scientific inquiry about food and nutrition all the time. Feh. Who knows what to eat anymore?

Though I still eat fish sometimes, I stopped eating other meat over a year ago. My health has improved, but it has been a challenge with my over-scheduled life-style that also involves travel. I’ve been shocked to find places in the U.S. with no vegetarian options whatsoever. I’ve also found people who are entirely unsympathetic about it. Add to that the fact that most available food is loaded with chemicals, preservatives and sodium. To paraphrase Network: The air is not fit to breathe; the food is not fit to eat. I’m mad as hell, yes. But I still have to eat something.

My fantasy is to live in a world where all food is good for me.

As for longevity, again: Feh. Who wants to be 140? I’m 37 and my feet hurt. Not to mention all my foibles and limitations that I already find annoying; another 100 years of clutter, procrastination, and the best of intentions all gone awry? Please, no. Ms. Traister points out that you gotta have some serious cash to survive that long. You think Social Security will still be around? Ha!