Tuesday, April 03, 2007





The fungus is among us.
A Margaret Smith print joins two Vested Gentress screen prints.
Collect them all and you'd be well on your way to a week's worth of mushroom-themed attire. Yes, that is a challenge. And yes, I'm talking to you. Meet me at the crossroads at dawn for a novelty print duel. Bring your seconds and your steamer trunks. En garde!
In the cinematic version of my life (working title: The Gilded Assassin) this would totally happen. And beneath each novelty print dress would be another. Each one exponentially more fabulous. Until the novelty print of all novelty prints was revealed.
And just what is that? Well, you'll have to see the movie.
I love the polka dots on the Margaret Smith print, though would be wary of wearing red, white and blue together. Except perhaps on Bastille Day. With a white Marie Antoinette wig.
I like the love-struck frogs on the First VG print, but would prefer it without the gender associations of the false eyelashes on the frog on the right. Or is it mascara? I mean, why are cartoon animals genderized? That always creeped me out as a kid. Like, why was Lady (of Lady and the Tramp) all feminine and long-lashed? She was supposed to be a dog, for crying out loud. Dagnabit! Why do puppets, cartoons and stuffed animals need to wear bows, lipstick and false eyelashes to be female? Why are they male by default if they do not?
Why are animals used to bolster the human idea of the gender binary? Why can't two frogs meet romantically without humans having to designate one as male and the other as female.
True, I have posted a Vested Gentress with long-lashed horses in the past. And I didn't kick up a fuss. All the horses had long lashes and braids. Plus they were lined up like the Rockettes and winking. And on the back of the dress were the horse's bums. Just slightly below the wearer's bum. I remember writing something about looking like a horse's ass (and if I could learn to link to myself I'd be less foolish), but didn't discuss the gender politics. I know, I know. But I've evolved since then.

The last one is my fave. It looks like a uniform for a biologist working on a space station in a 1970's movie where the earth has been destroyed by capitalist greed and brave scientist ladies are trying to recreate our biosphere on another planet by using early 20th Century illustrations.
I like that this frog is sulking, and I like the green fabric in the kickpleat. I identify with this frog.

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